Always Sleeping
Alex-ington.
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Okay. For those of you who don’t know me personally, I’d like to preface this rant by saying that I have a wonderful boyfriend with whom I celebrated our anniversary with on June 1st. I am very much in love with him, and him me, and I’m not the type of person to even consider cheating. That being said, here is my life:
May 31st, I attend the birthday party of this guy I know’s older brother. It’s a lot of fun, and I end up driving the guy home since he’s drunk. In the car, we’re talking about how we’re glad we ended up being friends and all that since we used to have mad crushes on each other back in the day that never amounted to anything. I made some comment about how our friendship works out now because we’ve already moved past the attraction phase. He shook his head laughing, and stated “Well, let’s just say I respect Clay. We’ll end that conversation there” and got out of the car mumbling some more technical reasons why we wouldn’t work out. My gut instinct was to be upset that he would even consider ruining our friendship, and as I thought more on it, I realized that I had wanted him to say that to me for years. All of my wildest dreams had come true, but I didn’t want anything to do with them. I was angry that the words were said because I truly loved Clay, and my sophomore year crush was not even a blip on my radar.
Then tonight, this boy who I never really talked to, but my friend group lusted after for years texts me “puleese marry me” out of the blue. We talk about his modeling career in LA, and he keeps hitting on me, telling me how Kat von D has nothing on me, and how he misses seeing me so much, and calling me wifey. This boy tried to hook up with me around the same time Clay and I were first talking, and my friend group said I should’ve done something then. I’m so happy I didn’t do anything then, and even happier for not doing anything now.
Within a week of my anniversary, all of these classically attractive boys come out of the left field and talk about how they like me. What? No. Clay’s my one and only. Whether you be awesome at making coffee, or a model in LA, you have nothing on my Dungeon Master.
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- [I had posted these links on my facebook wall with the following caption: http://imgur.com/U2RAb and http://i.imgur.com/fWqV2.png]
- Me: Final post regarding what happened in North Carolina, simply because it spells out the situation in layman's terms. It can't be argued.
- Cousin's Husband: I tried to jump start a car using 2 positive cables, didn't work! Then I tried it with the two negative cables, still didn't work! Why, because batteries where made to work with a positive and negative, just like male and female. People have been trying to make it work for years now, and thank GOD North Carolina got the votes they needed!
- Me: Separation of church and state. That's all that needs to be said. Believe what you may about the afterlife, but you can't use your religious freedom to take away the rights of others. Plus, love isn't a car. Love is a complex entity that we have absolutely no control over. Please understand this isn't an attack against Christianity, this is an attack against inequality.
- C.H.: I am all for equal rights for all, regardless of my Christian beliefs. With that being said, I will agree with homosexuality as soon as I see two dudes or two females make a baby together, naturally! Am I not for being mean to gays, because that is not right. And about Love, your right, we have no control over what or who we love, but just because I love to drink liquor in excess doesn't mean its right to be an alcolohic. We have to the difference between right and wrong, sin and not sin, and being gay is not natural, its wrong!
- Friend: How can you possibly say that you are for equal rights for all, after saying thank god that North Carolina got the votes that they needed? That's like saying, "I'm not at all racist, but I hate black people purely because of their skin tone." It makes no sense
- Me: While you say you're for equal rights, you're fully supporting a vote that's entire intent is to take away people's rights. This wasn't just a vote against gay marriage; this was a vote against anyone who isn't in a traditional marriage. That includes parents who are not married or are in a civil union. It takes away the basic rights of those people, for example, it's near impossible for a family (man and woman, mind you) to get proper healthcare for their children. This vote hurt anyone who didn't follow the Christian and Catholic ideology of marriage. My mom and Donsheng are currently in a civil union. This vote would take away my right to healthcare since Donsheng is the one supporting me. Don't you see how it hurts people when it's placed in real life examples in front of you? Don't you see how many gay individuals commit suicide because they can't help the way they were born and people are telling them they live in sin?
- C.H.: Being gay is a choice, just as any other sin.
- Me: When did you decide to be straight? I don't want to argue with you, but really... Do you honestly believe that people would make the choice to live a more difficult life? That they would make the choice to be someone who is hated and discriminated against? Do you believe that they wouldn't just change back to straight when they were getting bullied? What about the suicide cases? Don't you think the choice to become straight is easier than the choice to kill yourself? Being gay is no more of a choice than being straight. Talk to any gay person. They'll inform you that there was no point in time that they chose to be gay.
- I made a follow up status because I don't intend to offend Christianity, or my family: I just wanted to say that my posts regarding gay rights should not be taken as an attack against Christianity. I have nothing against Christianity as a whole. I am offended, however, by people who want to take away the rights of others in the name of religion when there is a clear separation of church and state. If you believe that God doesn't approve of homosexuality, fine. But let God deal with it on his own in the afterlife, and let people experience equality here on Earth now.
- Do you guys have any advice for me? I honestly don't know how to handle people who act out of ignorance for human life and happiness, especially when they're members of my own family.
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I’m ashamed of my family.
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Photo reblogged from You're right. I won't give up.
How to move forward
You know what’s weird? That Cincinnati of all places would do this. Seriously, it’s one of the most conservative -and I don’t necessarily mean that politically- cities around. They’re backwards in some crucial ways, and Lexington has always been so open and diverse. It’s just weird… You’d think in an area that holds the largest gay population per capita in the country, we’d be a little more inviting to the gay community. It’s upsetting that people still can’t accept a natural phenomenon, especially when it doesn’t affect them at all.
TL;DR I’m ashamed that Cincinnati of all places would be more accepting than Lexington.
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Studying for finals. In need of some serious cuddling when I get home. I’m ready to breathe a sigh of relief and just fall into Clay’s furry chest. Feel him breathing deeply as I doze gently off to sleep.
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So when is Jason Segel asking for my hand in marriage, again? I’m a little tired of waiting.
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a little background behind my url:
cranesbill geranium.
I worked in a greenhouse over the summer and cranesbill geraniums were so rare in the respect that they were shade tolerant (able to survive darker days, resilient, strong) and perennial (they come back, return, continue to bloom every spring).
Not that being shade tolerant and perennial is all that rare (lots of ferns are like this!) but they still have this beautiful, vibrant bloom. A delicate, iridescent fan of petals. Everyday I would water the cranesbill geraniums, deadhead them, talk to them, care for them.
I admire them, strive to be like them. Strong and powerful yet still beautiful and gentle.
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He went to Steak n Shake with his wife every year for valentine’s day since before he was married. This is his first year without a valentine.
OH GOD MY HEART
